Heartbreak and Hope - 1 Samuel 1:3-18

There. We're going to be reading down through these verses in just a minute. There are Bibles in the chairs and some of the rows of chairs. If you'd like to follow along in a Bible, if I would have added all the verses we were doing, this is going to be like three or four pages. I'm going to read them, and then we'll walk through this chapter and reference these things. I'm going to begin by reading God's Word, beginning in 1 Samuel 1, and I'm going to begin in verse 3. Now this man used to go up year by year from his city to worship and to sacrifice to the Lord of hosts at Shiloh, where the two sons of Eli, Hophni, and Phinehas, were priests of the Lord. And on that day, when Elkanah sacrificed, he would give portions to Penaniah, his wife, and to all her sons and daughters, but to Hannah he gave a double portion because he loved her, though the Lord had closed her womb.

And her rival used to provoke her grievously to irritate her because the Lord had closed her womb. And so it went on year by year, as often as she went up to the house of the Lord, she used to provoke her. Therefore, Hannah wept and would not eat. And Elkanah, her husband, said to her, "Hannah, why do you weep? And why do you not eat? And why is your heart sad? Am I not more to you than ten sons?" And after they had eaten and drunk in Shiloh, Hannah rose. Now Eli the priest was sitting on the seat beside the doorpost of the temple of the Lord. And she was deeply distressed, and she prayed to the Lord and wept bitterly. And she vowed a vow and said, "O Lord of hosts, if you will indeed look on the affliction of your servant and remember me and not forget your servant, but will give to your servant a son,

then I will give him to the Lord all the days of his life, and no razor shall touch his head." And as she continued praying before the Lord, Eli observed her mouth, and Hannah was speaking in her heart. Only her lips moved, and her voice was not heard. Therefore Eli took her to be a drunken woman. And Eli said to her, "How long will you go on being drunk? Put your wine away from you." And Hannah answered, "No, my Lord, I am a woman troubled in spirit. I have drunk neither wine nor strong drink, but I have been pouring out my soul before the Lord. Do not regard your servant as a worthless woman, for all along I have been speaking out of my great anxiety and vexation." And then Eli answered, "Go in peace, and the God of Israel grant your petition that you have made to him."

And she said, "Let your servant find favor in your eyes." Then the woman went her way and ate, and her face was no longer sad." This is the word of the Lord. One of the things that I love about the word of God is how it is woven together by God's providential power and his great sovereignty from the beginning into the end. And one of the places where we get a glimpse of this is in the story and the account of Hannah and ultimately her son, Samuel, there is so much biblically that is happening in these verses. One of the things that we see is that the judge of Israel that precedes Eli is a man by the name of Samson. And the circumstances surrounding his birth are very similar to the circumstances surrounding the birth of Samuel.

It's almost as if God is turning the brokenness that happens under Samson upside down in the life of Samuel. And one of the great things we see is that's what our God does. He takes the broken and the hurting and he turns it upside down. So as we get ready to journey with Hannah from her heartbreak to ultimately her hope, let's pray and then we'll dive into it this morning. Father in heaven, I thank you so much for Jesus, and I thank you for grace. And I thank you for this account of this woman, Hannah, who in the midst of physical suffering, of emotional sorrow, of conflict within her family, of all of her struggles and all of her questions and all of her difficulties, may we see how she never wavers as she looks to you. And may you help us to see your goodness and how you transform us.

It is in Jesus' name we pray. Amen. We're going to pick up here at the very beginning in verse 3. And one of the things you find is if you have ever traveled with a group of people that no kind of trip, or if you've traveled with children, no family trip is ever without any kind of incident. And I remember the first time we traveled, when Evelyn was first born, and there was just one extra person, but it seems like about three times the extra stuff. And of course, halfway to where we're going, we forget stuff that we need, and we have to stop. There is no long trip for us that seems like it goes without any kind of struggle. And our text this morning, and our account of this remarkable journey from heartbreak to hope, begins with a family trip.

And it says, "Now this man," that's Elkanah, "used to go up year by year from his city to worship and to sacrifice to the Lord of hosts at Shiloh, where the two sons of Eli, Hophni, and Phinehas were priests of the Lord." And it sounds like a pretty simple beginning. They're going to get everybody together and go to what would be the Old Testament sort of correlation to church. They're going to go to the house of the Lord. They're going to worship. They're going to pray. They're going to celebrate. And we think that's not really that big of a deal. But sometimes, right, it's really hard to get everybody up and get everybody ready for church. And 3,000 years ago, this was even a bigger deal. The primary mode of transportation is walking. Most of us, and there's a couple of us, Derek and I walked to church this morning,

but that's because I live right next door and he lives right across the street. If you had to walk to church this morning, a large portion of us would not have been here. And from where Elkanah and Hannah and his other wife live to where the house of the Lord is at Shiloh, it's about 20 miles. And we go, "Well, that's not very far. I can do 20 miles in like 15 minutes," depending on how fast you drive. But remember, this is like an entire day's journey. And have you ever had to hike or tried to hike with children, right? Like three minutes in, you're not even a mile down and you're carrying somebody. And additionally, the primary mode is walking. We're not talking about having a truck or a trunk in a car to be able to carry the stuff you need, right?

This is not a day trip. Even though it's only like 20 miles, right? They're just going to spend a day walking, everything they need for the feast, all of their clothes, probably their lodging if they're carrying a tent. All of this has to be packed up, it has to be moved that 20 miles, and it has to be reset up. It's not like you get to the end of the day of travel, check into a nice hotel room, get some dinner and go sit by the pool for a few hours before going to bed, right? This is not a small journey, even though the mileage by our standards is very short, right? We can't even spend eight hours in the car and not have a meltdown, let alone walking for an entire day, right? This is a complicated undertaking, and to make it more complicated, what we find is there is a family dynamic at play in Elkanah's family.

1 Samuel 1 verse 2 tells us that Elkanah has two wives, and this is going to make things much, much more difficult, not just because there's more people, but because of the conflict and the emotions that surround this specific trip to worship God. And what we find is when Samuel is recording this, whoever wrote the book of Samuel records this, that Elkanah has two wives, this is not a recommendation by God, but rather a record of actual events. And what we find throughout the history of the Bible, everywhere that you find relationships outside of God's design, there's heartbreak, there's conflict, there's bitterness and brokenness. From Abraham to Jacob, both of whom are reflected in this account, to David and Solomon who come later, it always ends badly. And as a side note, Elkanah is going to say to his heartbroken wife, "Am I not worth more to you than ten sons?"

in a direct reference to Jacob and Rachel and Leah, which if you know anything about those chapters of the book of Genesis, is an absolute train wreck of a family. And despite never seeing this positively portrayed, over and over again we seem to think that we can make it work. I know God has designed us to work and to function in this way, but rather than listen to the one who knows what they're talking about, I'm going to do it my own way. And one of the things we must understand is that God's design and His commands are not to keep us from something good, but protect us from the brokenness that results from following our own desires. Right? God's law and His commands are offense, keeping us from the cliff, not a clothes sign on the ice cream store.

When God commands us, He's not doing so to prevent us from having something wonderful, but rather to keep us from brokenness and hurting ourselves. And even though things in Elkanah's household are not very happy, the purpose of this journey is joy. In Deuteronomy, we find the purpose of this is to be before the Lord and rejoice with your household to celebrate the blessings of God. In fact, in Deuteronomy 12:8, it says, "You shall eat this feast before the Lord your God in the place that God will choose," in this case Shiloh, "and your son, and your daughter, and your male servant, and your female servant, and the Levite who is within your towns, and you shall rejoice in your Lord your God in all that you undertake." This is a time where they're going is to celebrate all the good gifts that God has given.

From the meat and the grain He has provided, to the grapes that have been made into wine, to the children that have been born, this is a celebratory barbecue in the presence of God to celebrate all the wonderful things that God has done. And for Hannah, this journey is not one of joy. It's of heartbreak, right? Elkanah has two wives. The name of the one was Hannah. The name of the other one was Paniah. And Paniah had children, but Hannah had no children. It's difficult to be thankful when everybody who surrounds you has wonderful things happening, but you have nothing good going on. It's like when somebody comes in, and you're in a bad mood, and they say, "Good morning!" And you go, "What's good about it?" Right? That's my go-to, right? Somebody's like, "Hey, good morning!" I'm like, "What's good about it?" Right? This is Hannah.

She's at this place to celebrate the blessings of God, and one of those blessings specifically listed in Scripture is children. And she goes, "What do I have to celebrate?" What's good about this? In those moments, we might pretend, and we might make an attempt, but our hearts are still heavy. So, I want us to see Hannah's heartbreak in this situation. Now, this man used to go up year by year from his city to worship and sacrifice to the Lord of Hosts at Shiloh, where the two sons of Hopni and Phinehas were priests of the Lord. And on the day when Elkanah sacrificed, he would give portions to Peniah, his wife, and to all her sons and daughters, but to Hannah he gave a double portion, because he loved her, though the Lord had closed her womb.

And a rival used to provoke her grievously to irritate her, because the Lord had closed her womb. So it went year by year. As often as she went up to the house of the Lord, she used to provoke her. Therefore, Hannah wept and would not eat. And Elkanah, her husband, said to her, "Hannah, why do you weep? And why do you not eat? And why is your heart sad? Am I not more to you than ten sons?" To understand Hannah's heartbreak, we need to understand Hannah's burdens. Everyone is celebrating but Hannah. She is completely left out. She's carrying the physical burden of not having children. She's carrying an emotional burden of feeling like she is not enough. She has not been able to provide what she thought she was supposed to be provided. We desire to be loved for who we are.

And Elkanah says, "I love you, but not enough to not go get a second wife." Right? Her emotional burden is deep. But she's also carrying the burden of conflict. In verse 6, it says, "Her rival or her troubler used to provoke her grievously to irritate her because the Lord had closed her womb, and she has been carrying these burdens for years." Verse 3 says, "Year after year." Not just a day or two or a month or two, but year after year of sorrow, of this physical burden, of this emotional burden, of this burden of conflict happening over time. And Hannah, she needs somebody to come along and lift her burdens. But everybody who attempts to do so just makes it worse. There's one person that God has provided to Hannah who is supposed to lift her burdens,

and that's Elkanah, her husband. And every attempt, he just makes it worse. Just constantly digging himself deeper into this problem. We find it in this text. And one of the things that stands out is Hannah is not eating. That's one of the ways in which we can diagnose without a battery of tests, or a bunch of diagnostics, how somebody's feeling. How is your appetite? When I was on dialysis for my kidneys, it was one of the questions I got asked multiple times a week. How are you feeling? How are you eating? How is your appetite? Hannah, in this text, has no appetite. She doesn't want food. She doesn't want to eat. She's not hungry. And here comes Elkanah, and do you know what he does? In fact, try to put what he does in context. Imagine Rachel calls me one day and says, "Hey, the car won't start."

And I respond to her on the phone by saying, "Well, if you try taking the key, putting it in the ignition, and turning it, seeing if that helps the car to start, right? You're going to be looking for my body for quite some time if I do that." But that's exactly what Elkanah does. His wife is suffering under this physical burden and emotional burden, as we'll see in a minute, a spiritual burden, the burden of conflict. The one person who is supposed to help her goes, "Why are you crying? Why aren't you eating?" And he goes and it says in Scripture that he gives her a double portion. So you're not hungry and you don't want to eat. Here, have double the amount of food, right? That doesn't help. And it doesn't necessarily mean double in terms of quantity. It can also mean the better cuts.

That as they're sitting around this table celebrating, she gets the filet or the ribeye and everybody else gets ground beef. And so he's not only, in his attempt to comfort her, making her feel like she's not seen or heard because she doesn't need food, but he's also making her the object of conflict and scorn in the midst of this. I know if you're not eating, I know what you need is probably more food. You see, Elcano, like most of us men, wants to fix the problem. Let's fix it and let's move on. Let's get some food in you and you're all set, rather than deal with really what's going on. And next, what you see is instead of backtracking and doing what's right, he just keeps digging. And he goes, "Why is your heart sad? What do you have to be sad? Am I not more to you than ten sons?"

Do you know what he's saying in this? What do you have to weep and talk about? You have me, your husband, the answer to all of your problems and to the desires of your heart. And what he is saying to her in the midst of this physical, spiritual, emotional, conflicted burden that's been happening for years is he's going, "Don't you think I'm good enough?" He's turned it to make it about himself rather than about her. And you can see it in what he says, "Am I not more to you than ten sons? Aren't I worth more than the sons?" What Hannah wants to hear here is not, "Am I worth more?" But he wants, she wants to hear that she's the one who has worth. That she's the one that's valued. And also maybe not marrying an extra wife. Right? She's kind of dealing with this whole thing alone. And the reality is the heart of Hannah's problem isn't only physical,

the ability to have a child, or the emotional, one of two wives and this feeling of loss and struggle and not being good enough, or the conflict that's happening. Ultimately, her struggle is theological. You see, in Deuteronomy chapter 7, one of the promises of God to those people who are living in the land was this: "You shall be blessed above all peoples. There shall be no male or female barren among you or your livestock." And here is Hannah, and she is worshiping, and she knows the promises of God, and we know that she knows because she is one of the most righteous women in the Old Testament. And she has this problem because she knows her everyday life. And she hasn't had children. And there are no children, but God has promised children. Where's the promise for me, God? Where are your promises for me? What are you doing?

It doesn't seem like you're doing much, and like many of us, her problems aren't merely physical or relational. Her ultimate struggle is theological. What do you do when you wake up every morning of every day and the thing that you've been pouring your heart out for just hasn't happened? What do you do when God makes a promise, but it's not there yet? How do you deal with that situation? And I want you to see how Hannah responds to this heartbreak that she's experiencing everywhere from spiritual to physical to her relationships, from her doofus of a husband. Hannah has a lot of options. Let me give you just two from her family tree. She could have tried everything in her power to fix her broken heart. All right, if God won't fix this, I will. There was another woman once in a childless situation generations ago in this same family.

Her name was Sarah, and she tries to fix it on her own, and it ends in brokenness and conflict. But we have no indication in Scripture or in this text that Hannah has done anything other than rely upon God. But she also could have become jealous and conniving. In Genesis 30, one of her ancestors, Jacob, marries two sisters, Rachel and Leah. There is a distinct parallel in this text to that account. And if you read Genesis chapter 30, it's a train wreck. Because Leah can have children, and Rachel can't, and there's conniving, and there's plotting, and there's getting more wives, and there's deals being made back and forth. But Hannah doesn't do any of that. She doesn't try to take it in her own hands. She doesn't become bitter and angry. In fact, what you see is just this fullness of grief.

And while she could have done any number of things to try and fix her broken heart, she doesn't. She turns to the one place where there is true hope. Notice that in all the brokenness and heartbreak, there is the constant provocation of Elkanah's other wife. And Hannah doesn't resort to those kind of things, but she reigns. I want you to take a look with me at Hannah's prayer. After they had eaten and drunk in Shiloh, Hannah rose. In Shiloh, the priest was sitting on the seat beside the doorpost of the temple. And she was deeply distressed and prayed to the Lord and wept bitterly. And she vowed a vow, and she said, "O Lord of hosts, if you will indeed look on the affliction of your servant and remember me, and not forget your servant, but will give to your servant a son,

then I will give him to the Lord all the days of his life, and no razor shall touch his head." And so Hannah, in her brokenness, runs to God. And at first, it doesn't seem very hopeful. But her response is to pour out her heart before God. And I want you to understand, this is not a shallow prayer that Hannah prays. It is filled with deep hurt. The phrase that says, "When she was deeply distressed and she wept bitterly." The phrase, in the bitterness of her soul, it's used elsewhere of great suffering. In the book of Ruth, it's used of the loss of a child. In Job, it's used of the loss of not just his children, but everything. When she is weeping bitterly, this is not just a couple tears because she's had a bad day,

but it's because her life has fallen apart and she has no hope. She prays deeply in the midst of her deep hurt. Interesting, biblically, that the answer to that kind of deep weeping bitterness never is fixed by a person. It's only ever fixed by the goodness of God. So she goes to the right place and takes her heartbreak to God. Her prayer is also filled with a deep theology. It's interesting, she refers to God as the Lord of Hosts or God Almighty. We'll see in a minute, this is the first place in all of the Old Testament where anyone refers to God in prayer as God Almighty. People would say, talking about God, this is the first place that anybody has said it to God. Her prayer is deeply humble. She comes not on the basis of deserving or demanding, but on brokenness.

And when she dedicates her son, or vows to dedicate her son, she's not doing this as a way of manipulating God, but rather saying, "God, in your gift to me, I know that he belongs to you, and I will dedicate him in your service, that he will follow you, and he will trust you, and he will love." She makes this vow of which there is no parallel of any other woman in the Hebrew Scriptures. She's dedicating her life and the life of her son. And notice this is deeply personal. When you contrast Eli, the religious professional, sitting on his chair outside the house of the Lord, he only speaks about God. In every instance in their interaction, he speaks about God. Hannah speaks to God. Her prayer contains deep hurt, deep theology, but also deeply personal.

And despite all of her heartbreak, Hannah is a remarkable woman of faith. Let me just give you a list of the things that you see about Hannah. One commentator said she is likely the most righteous woman in at least the Old Testament, maybe in the entire Bible. She goes to the house of the Lord, something else that no other woman in the Old Testament is mentioned doing. She's the only woman to make or fulfill a vow. She's the only woman specifically said to pray. Her prayer is one of the longest in all of the Old Testament, not just among women, but among men as well. She speaks God's name more than any other woman 18 times. She doesn't just do good, but she avoids the bad. She doesn't scheme like Sarah or Rachel. She doesn't make an unrighteous vow like Jephthah who comes before her in the book of Judges.

And this righteous woman is moved by God from heartbreak to hope. She continued praying before the Lord. Eli, the priest at the time, is sort of guarding the temple. He's on guard duty, or the tabernacle. Because what happens at these feasts, sometimes it gets a little rowdy, and people get out of hand. And so he's sitting there making sure this doesn't happen. And as he sits there, he sees this woman come up, and tears streaming down her face. And she begins to look like she's praying, but there's no noise. But her mouth is moving, and he assumes, because Eli likes to look at the outside rather than the heart of the matter. He assumes the worst and confronts her, and add this to her hurt. In addition to all the family hurt, she comes to the house of the Lord.

And the one who is supposed to be there to help and comfort, instead confronts. Eli, throughout Scripture, is depicted as blind and powerless. Not active. He doesn't hear God speak. He has worthless sons, and I don't say that to be mean. Verse 12 of chapter 2 says, "The sons of Eli were worthless men." He criticizes them from stealing from God's people, but evidently enjoys the results of their theft. Because he dies, because he's so big, he tips over in a chair and breaks his neck. But here's what I love. This is such a good message to those of us who have been hurt by the church. Despite all of his brokenness and faults, God uses Eli to encourage heartbroken Hannah. Despite all the things that he's done wrong, God can still use him. In fact, in my notes here it says, "God can use a doofus."

And God uses him to bring an answer to Hannah. And in verse 18 it says this, "Let your servant find favor in your eyes." And then the woman went her way and ate, and her face was no longer sad. So in one sense, nothing's changed for Hannah. She still physically doesn't have a child. She does have a promise by this guy, Eli, who says, sort of in a general platitude, "May God give you what it is that you desire." That's all she has. So in one sense for her, nothing has changed. All the hurts, all the heartbreak is there, but look, something has changed. The woman went away and ate, and her face was no longer sad. No longer sad, her appetite's restored. The problem that brought her to the house of the Lord is still there.

She still doesn't have a child, so what has changed? Remember all those burdens that we had stacked upon the back of Hannah, physically, emotionally, spiritually, relationally? What Hannah has done is she has taken all of those burdens and brought them to God. Peter says it this way, "Humble yourselves under the mighty hand of God," and that's what Hannah does. She comes to God Almighty, the first person in the Old Testament, to say that to Him with all of her hurts and all of her struggles. And she comes small and weak to a great God, so that at the proper time He might exalt you. Listen to this, because this is what Hannah does. Casting all your anxieties or casting all your cares on Him because He cares for you. What changed in Hannah is not her physical situation, it's her heart.

Because she has taken all of this brokenness and brought it to God. She's the only one who can truly carry her burdens. She's given it all to God. Let's say this, like this doesn't happen by accident, right? We all have habits, things that we do unconsciously without thinking about it. And what you find is that if you have a habit when things are good, you're still going to have that habit when things are bad. And so if you are self-reliant and focused on yourself during the good times when things get bad, you're still going to be self-reliant. However, if you are depending on God in the midst of the good times, when things get bad, you're going to depend on Him in the bad times. And it appears from Hannah's prayer and Hannah's song and Hannah's life and Hannah's faithfulness in her vow that she doesn't just depend on God when things get bad.

She has that habit and that hope ingrained in her heart that when it all falls apart and she reaches that breaking point, she runs to the goodness of God. She already has a strong spiritual foundation, maybe even belt, not in spite of her suffering, but by her suffering. That she has developed this by meditating on the promises of God and looking to God's promises. Her prayer in the next chapter is filled with those themes that she knows God and has directed her mind to God so that when things fall apart, that's where she runs. If you want to... Dave and I were talking this morning. I told him I was going to steal this. We were talking about meditating on the promises of God. And he said, "I heard one time, and I think this is so good."

We say, "I don't know how to meditate on the promises of God. I don't know how to meditate at all." And the response Dave said was, "Well, do you know how to worry?" Right? Because in worry, you know what you're doing? You're meditating on every bit of brokenness. And every possibility, when we come and meditate on the promises of God, right, we're just fixing our mind on that. And thinking about that hope and those possibilities, and this has been Hannah's practice in the good times. When it all falls apart, it's there in the bad times. We see that God is at work even in our suffering. Do you know that in answering Hannah's prayer, God's addressing the problem with the entire nation of Israel? And this one woman in Shiloh, praying without even being able to speak out loud, God's not just healing her heart, but He's dealing with the problems in Israel.

The heart of this text is to take our brokenness to God. And when we do that, immediately we begin to make excuses, right? Maybe our excuse is that our problems are too small, and I don't want to bother God with this because He's busy, right? If I can do it myself, I don't need to bother God. And so we look at our problems as small. The problem with that is the Bible. Jesus says that God cares about the flowers, and He cares about the birds, the smallest things that Jesus looked around and pointed to. Wouldn't He also care for your small problems? The flip side of this is maybe we say we don't want to bother God with our big problems. They're too big. I'll take care of them myself. I'll deal with this in my way and in my time and with my strength.

Wouldn't want to bother God. He's too busy with mine for my little problems. My big problems are going to take up too much of His time. We all have blind spots, things that don't make sense in our life until somebody points them out. So this week I really needed a haircut. Super busy. A lot of things happening all at once. I was like, "I'm not going to go to my regular guy because my hair is too long and too shaggy. I don't want to make him deal with that problem." One of my buddies went, "Didn't this guy sign up to cut hair regardless of how long it was?" And I was like, "Oh, well that makes sense now that you say it like that." How many of us do that with God? "Well, I've got to get myself straightened up and cleaned up and fixed up before I can go to Him.

I'll fix my big problems and then God will accept me." The problem with our heartbroken hearts is either we think we're too small that God wouldn't care, or we're too big that God wouldn't be able to fix it. And the heart of both of those is this focus on self. "My problems are too small or my problems too big and I'm the unique case and God couldn't help me." And one of the messages, 1 Samuel chapter 1, you're neither too small, Hannah in all of her smallness. And neither are you too big, Israel and its divisions and its enemies that God is solving at the same time. With the same answer to prayer, He solves both the prayer of the one known woman from the little town and the prayer of an entire nation. Your problems are not too small and they're not too big.

Maybe your third excuse is this: I'm just too far away from God. He wouldn't want me. He couldn't use me. He wouldn't want me anywhere near Him. Listen to this: For while we were still weak, at the right time Christ died for the ungodly. For one will scarcely die for a righteous person, though perhaps for a good person one would dare even to die. But God chose His love for us, and that while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us. Not when we were strong. Not when we were good. Not when we had life all put together. The point of this chapter is in your heartbreak and your brokenness run to the One who can restore you. You're not too far away. Your problems aren't too small. Your problems aren't too big. Jesus died for the broken and for sinners. Let's pray.

Father in heaven, help us in the brokenness of our hearts to see the hope that you have offered us. Help us to run to you with our struggles and our hurts to see how you revive and restore. How you deal with our anxiety and our heartbreak. We thank you for Hannah and for her example and for your goodness. We thank you for the good news of the gospel that tells us even when we're weak and broken, you came and died for us.